Q&A - Some common questions I get asked A LOT.

There are some questions I get asked over and over and I felt it was important to share them.

My partner checks my phone and doesn’t like my friends, but I’m not scared of him. Is that coercive control? 

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My partner wants to put a tracker on my phone or car, should I be worried?

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My husband tells me he’ll have an affair, if I don’t have sex with him.

A lot of women have approached me to say they have been on some domestic abuse education programme and despite the knowledge they have gained, they have still ended up in a relationship with an abuser. 

A lot of the times I am asked “ why don’t these courses work?” 

The answer I give is that these courses are educational and offer insight and understanding but that they are not guarantees. The biggest advice I can give is to slow things down. Abusers often want to rush relationships and use a number of strategies such as love bombing, time monopolising and non accidental fortuitous timing, pressurised investment to speed up a relationship 

My husband tells me to lose weight, or he’ll leave me.

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Why is nothing being done about ending DV?

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Why can’t she leave?

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Sadipscing elitr

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When I tell police what he does, they tell me that I need evidence. I don’t know how to write what I can’t see.

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Why do some many women go from one abusive relationship to another?

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What can I do, so I don’t get involved with another abuser?

A lot of women have approached me to say they have been on some domestic abuse education programme and despite the knowledge they have gained, they have still ended up in a relationship with an abuser. 

A lot of the times I am asked “ why don’t these courses work?” 

The answer I give is that these courses are educational and offer insight and understanding but that they are not guarantees. The biggest advice I can give is to slow things down. Abusers often want to rush relationships and use a number of strategies such as love bombing, time monopolising and non accidental fortuitous timing, pressurised investment to speed up a relationship 

Why do I feel so guilty? 

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I read stories about abuse and mine isn’t that bad so I can’t be a victim of abuse .

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I’ve been told not to call myself a victim but a survivor. The thing is, I don’t feel like a survivor.

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I’m coparenting with my abusive ex. How can I make things better?

A lot of women have approached me to say they have been on some domestic abuse education programme and despite the knowledge they have gained, they have still ended up in a relationship with an abuser. 

A lot of the times I am asked “ why don’t these courses work?” 

The answer I give is that these courses are educational and offer insight and understanding but that they are not guarantees. The biggest advice I can give is to slow things down. Abusers often want to rush relationships and use a number of strategies such as love bombing, time monopolising and non accidental fortuitous timing, pressurised investment to speed up a relationship 

Am I a victim if my abuse wasn’t as severe as someone else’s.

Est ultricies integer quis auctor elit sed. Purus sit amet luctus venenatis lectus magna fringilla. Consequat semper viverra nam libero justo laoreet sit amet. Nec ultrices dui sapien eget mi proin sed libero enim. Neque egestas congue quisque egestas diam in. Risus commodo viverra maecenas accumsan. 

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